ARGYLLE: AN OVERSTRETCHED SPY THRILLER THAT LOSES ITS CHARM FAST

From what looked like a snazzy premise of art imitating life, Matthew Vaughn seemed to get
lost in keeping the concept alive for a runtime that is too long for it, along with losing the directorial flair of his Kingsman films. As a result, Argylle is very messy. It succeeds well in the first hour where the imagination of Ellie Conway, an introverted spy novelist, matches the ongoings of a shady syndicate and a spy, played by Sam Rockwell of all people, is sent to protect her. So, let’s clear this up, Henry Cavill is not the main star of this show. As it is always wonderful to see his beautiful face and for him to live, albeit briefly, in the role of James Bond that he may never see, Cavill is a fleeting cameo designed only for ticket sales. It would have been fun had he played more of a part in the big twist at the end, but alas, one of the most popular actors of today is sprinkled throughout the first three quarters, then disappears and had me forget he was in the film, to begin with. It was also sad to see John Cena reduced to such an insignificant role, being the charisma shuttle that he is. Had these roles been given to rising stars or unknowns with distinct personalities that need to be released, the joke would have landed and it wouldn’t have been averted from the actual stars. Don’t want to sound rude but if you had the choice between Superman and Peacemaker in a buddy-spy film against mildly celebs like Rockwell and Bryce Dallas Howard, who would you go for? Anyway, on to the actual film.

 

Vaughn kept my interest at a fine level purely because of Sam Rockwell, through and through. The above comment may make you think I don’t like seeing Rockwell in the film; nothing could be further from the truth! Rockwell is one of my favourite actors and one I find disgracefully underrated, similar to Colin Ferral or Woody Harrelson. He’s a Swiss Army knife of acting and here, although the joke of Rockwell’s unlikelihood of being an action star is forever present, he fits it very well. Dallas Howard is perfectly suited to the role and I do think she has talent, but the script does put her in scenarios that are beyond her abilities as an actor later on, which I’ll soon divulge. For a while, Vaughn seemed to embrace a wacky script that seemed almost wholly original and had his usual knack for slick action sequences. And the actors all seemed to tightrope between the spy parody and graphic comedy (as much as you can get with PG-13). That is all except Bryan Cranston, sadly, as he seemed too wrapped up in being a Bond villain spoof and played it too silly. That is until the midway and the script veers into an onslaught of twists and turns more than a yoga class. Some of these work and then the rates get excessive, some are pointless and then one at the end was so pathetically predictable that I almost wanted to leave.

 

Vaughn seemed carried away with how many twists he could stuff into this adventure that hops from one identity to the next. First, it’s a parable of art and reality and then it veers into a generic spy thriller and then it a twist of a twist, a psychological warfare, something I cannot spoil but it is ridiculous. It doesn’t help how lengthy the runtime feels; an action spy thriller directed by the man who gave us The Secret Service should not have me checking my watch throughout the last forty minutes. It’s also the most time I’ve seen Vaughn as a director; it’s a Kingsman wannabe but with none of the bite and distinction that film had as it morphs into another spy thriller we’ve seen to death. And any attempts to replicate Kingsman fall flat, like a hallway sequence that had me cringing. Which is a result of Dallas Howard getting positioned in a role that doesn’t suit her. I find it very commendable that Vaughn wanted to give women who are not traditionally sculpted an opportunity to lead action sequences, but at the end of the day, it’s who is in the role that matters. Bryce Dallas Howard cannot come across as a person in the military, spy agency or wherever because her demeanour is less intimidating than a basket of baby puppies.

The best way to describe Argylle is Vaughn’s equivalent to Danny Boyle’s Yesterday: where a dynamic concept matched with a competent director falls through upon failure to take full advantage of the potential. From then on, Argylle becomes too haphazard, drawn out and, above all, lost in translation. Somewhere, there’s a spy adventure starring Henry Cavill with vibrancy and personality. Guy Ritchie, are you up for the challenge?